Sunday, 29 April 2012


We have people around us whom we love and have a deep connection with - family, relatives, friends. With love comes expectations.   Sometimes, people you are close to are not able to live up to those expectations, because they are different from you or don't feel the way you do about certain things. What is important to you may not not be important to the other person. What you see, maybe the others don't see it. And not everyone feels the same all the time. A once caring and attentive person could be tied up in his or her own world. People's emotions and views can change. If you have something on your mind and you expect someone to do something they way you perceive, be frank and tell them. Now even after you explained yourself, and they refuse or excuse themselves from fulfilling your request or expectation, well, then, that's just the way they are or they have a differing point of view. Do ask yourself, if your expectations are natural or unrealistic. If you stop having too many expectations out of people whose views differ from yours, you will not get angry or hurt. Actions would stop being good or bad if you stopped judging. But if a loved one is into something destructive or unlawful or constantly getting into trouble, it's only natural to have realistic expectations that the person should lead a non-destructive, fulfilling life and that would require some action like seeking help. 

Sometimes we hover around people who don't even like us and we expect them to pay attention to us or include us in their life which is terrible. Don't push yourself into other's lives or affairs. Contrary to others' actions, you should value yourself, even though, it's not necessarily, everyone else will. Accept those around you, without frustration, anger, sadness and don't hold any grudge against anyone. If you harbor negative feelings, it's you who suffer, not them. One last word, stay far away from toxic or hurtful friends and relatives. You are better off without them. Life becomes so much easier if you adopt a sense of detachment, which allows room for compromise without huge expectations. This helps you to accept your family, relatives and friends with their imperfections, faults and unique personality. Try to think of ways to improve yourself and your life, rather than worrying about why the other person is not like you. We all know the five fingers on our hand are not the same...not even the finger prints.

* This post deals with expectations of family, relatives and friends and is not related to employment/job expectations

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