LOVE YOU FOREVER BY ROBERT MUNSCH

I received 'Love you for Forever' in my mail from a dear young lady. It is quite touching and would resonate with all parents old and young. I thought of sharing it in my blog.

This is from the famous children's book ' Love you Forever' written by Robert Munsch, that illustrates mother's love for her child even when they are grown and far away from home. The part where the author writes about the mother creeping through the window of the adult child is only a metaphor used to show that though he is far away, she still thinks of him and holds him very dear. The story also shows how when the child become a parent, he or she too will love his or her own child endlessly just as his parent did. A mother's love is unconditional, that transcends all barriers, time and space.

A mother held her new baby and very slowly rocked him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. And while she held him, she sang:

I'll love you forever,

I'll like you for always,

As long as I'm living

my baby you'll be.

The baby grew. He grew and he grew and he grew. He grew until he was two years old, and he ran all around the house. He pulled all the books off the shelves. He pulled all the food out of the refrigerator and he took his mother's watch and flushed it down the toilet. Sometimes his mother would say, "this kid is driving me CRAZY!"

But at night time, when that two-year-old was quiet, she opened the door to his room, crawled across the floor, looked up over the side of his bed; and if he was really asleep she picked him up and rocked him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. While she rocked him she sang:

I'll love you forever,

I'll like you for always,

As long as I'm living

my baby you'll be.

The little boy grew. He grew and he grew and he grew. He grew until he was nine years old. And he never wanted to come in for dinner, he never wanted to take a bath, and when grandma visited he always said bad words. Sometimes his mother wanted to sell him to the zoo!

But at night time, when he was asleep, the mother quietly opened the door to his room, crawled across the floor and looked up over the side of the bed. If he was really asleep, she picked up that nine-year-old boy and rocked him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. And while she rocked him she sang:

I'll love you forever,

I'll like you for always,

As long as I'm living

my baby you'll be.

The boy grew. He grew and he grew and he grew. He grew until he was a teenager. He had strange friends and he wore strange clothes and he listened to strange music. Sometimes the mother felt like she was in a zoo!

But at night time, when that teenager was asleep, the mother opened the door to his room, crawled across the floor and looked up over the side of the bed. If he was really asleep she picked up that great big boy and rocked him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. While she rocked him she sang:

I'll love you forever,

I'll like you for always,

As long as I'm living

my baby you'll be.

That teenager grew. He grew and he grew and he grew. He grew until he was a grown-up man. He left home and got a house across town. But sometimes on dark nights the mother got into her car and drove across town. If all the lights in her son's house were out, she opened his bedroom window, crawled across the floor, and looked up over the side of his bed. If that great big man was really asleep she picked him up and rocked him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. And while she rocked him she sang:

I'll love you forever,

I'll like you for always,

As long as I'm living

my baby you'll be.

Well, that mother, she got older. She got older and older and older. One day she called up her son and said, "You'd better come see me because I'm very old and sick." So her son came to see her. When he came in the door she tried to sing the song. She sang:

I'll love you forever,

I'll like you for always...

But she couldn't finish because she was too old and sick. The son went to his mother. He picked her up and rocked her back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. And he sang this song:

I'll love you forever,

I'll like you for always,

As long as I'm living

my Mommy you'll be.

When the son came home that night, he stood for a long time at the top of the stairs. Then he went into the room where his very new baby daughter was sleeping. He picked her up in his arms and very slowly rocked her back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. And while he rocked her he sang:

I'll love you forever,

I'll like you for always,

As long as I'm living

my baby you'll be.

WHAT PARENTS OF LITTLE CHILDREN SHOULD KNOW BEFORE THEY PLAN A DAY OR EVENING OUT

Small children would be rather be doing something fun than attend a musical concert, or a movie or a theatrical play, where they get bored and start kicking the seats in front or them, or wailing or screaming and disturbing the people around, while sometimes parents are oblivious at the extreme inconvenience the child is causing to others. How people react in this situation, fall in two categories. 'I am getting disturbed, but I'll put up with it and they silently suffer' or 'I am getting disturbed, I am not going to put up with it and they speak up'. The victims are lucky if the parents'  response is sensitive and they quieten or console the child making sure the child won't cause any more distraction. Worst is when person who is being disturbed point out his inconvenience, and the parents turn rude or  pretend they can't figure what's wrong  or it's like, 'what's the big deal' and do nothing about it. 

Parents with little children should be sensitive enough to understand not to put the child in such situations and cause an ordeal to others. The child is too small to understand, but the parents are adult enough to understand. How can the people the child is disturbing enjoy the event they are attending?. It's just not fair. Remember, people attend concerts, theatrical shows, or go to the movies to have a good time. It's entertainment. They don't have to put up with your children's tantrums. That's is not people's idea of entertainment. 

You see, it's simple, children would rather do things that are fun for them. They would probably appreciate and enjoy certain things you enjoy once they are grown. By then, they would also know its not right to disturb others. Family time or fun time for children is not attending concerts, sitting still in a theater or restaurant.  You know what little children would really like?

* Running and playing in parks

* Going on rides, swing, slide at children's parks

* Being outdoors at the beach and playing with sand and water

* Being with other kids their age and playing indoor or outdoors

* Special places where they have fun activities for small children

* Be creative. Think of the fun things that you all can do together that will make the child happy.

Try to leave little children in the care of your parents, close relatives, friends or a baby sitter, for a short while, if you want to attend events children would find boring and cause disturbance to others. Or if you don't have an alternative, please wait patiently until they are a little more grown to enjoy doing such events with your children. It's every young parent's responsibility to ensure as much as possible that other people are not disturbed or troubled in any way by their children. It just takes little bit of sensitivity and concern for fellow beings. 

PARENTING - KEEP AN EYE ON YOUR CHILDREN IN SUPERMARKETS OR SHOPPING CENTRES

It's little children's nature to explore, to play and to have fun wherever they are. When you take them out, it's freedom galore. To keep them safe, or wandering off out of curiosity, or to prevent them from disrupting or damaging goods or dropping stuff at supermarkets or department stores, it's important to explain to them what they can do or cannot do before you take them out and even while you are at the store. As parents, make sure they are around you while you shop and that way you can keep an eye on them.

Two days ago, I was at a supermarket, where I saw two little children had dropped a tall rack of chocolates accidently, while they were running around and playing. The rack fell, all the chocolates got scattered on the floor blocking the way to that section on one side. Anyways, there was no damage done, nothing breakable. The sales attendant was notified and he rearranged the rack and the chocolates. But then, what if the items that fell or likely to fall, when children accidently knock down while they are playing, were things that are easily breakable like glass bottles filled with juice or glass ware or plates!

After the chocolate rack falling incident, the kids didn't stop at that, they were running around all over the place again. What happened to the parents?

MOM AND BABY - BEFORE AND AFTER BIRTH

Isn't this really beautiful?

BEST PLACES IN THE WORLD TO BE A MOTHER

Norway

As per the 12th annual Mother's Index 2011 released by 'Save the Children', Norway ranks No.1 - as the best place in the world to be a mother and Afghanistan ranks last (worst place to be mother). UK came in at 13, Canada ranked 20, and the United States comes in at  no. 31 among the 43 developed countries. This census is based on health, education and economic conditions for women and children in 164 countries. 

Seven indicators were considered for women in each developed country: 

1. risk of maternal death,

2. how many women use modern contraception, 

3. life expectancy, 

4. years of schooling, 

5. maternity leave benefits,

6. how much women earn as compared to men and 

7. the percentage of women in government. 

The study also measured three indicators for children: primary and secondary school enrollment numbers and childhood mortality rates in each country.

PARENT - CHILD AND FAMILY INVOLVEMENT QUESTIONNAIRE

Where does family time feature in your 1 to 10 list of priorities?(Top/ middle/ last)

Family involvement is the best investment you can make. In a loving, caring and nurturing family, a child grows up to deal with relationships, cope with situations and learns important values that helps the child grow into a  healthy  individual.

Do you and your spouse spend time together with your children everyday?( Yes/No)
If it's a yes, then wonderful, if it's No, then make time.

What about the weekends?...do you take your children out to places where all of you can enjoy and have a fun time? (Yes/No)
Your children would adore you if it is a yes, if not...makes some changes and take them out. It's an important way of bonding and teaching your children how valuable family time is and how important they are to you. 

Does your child communicate with you without fear or inhibitions? (Yes, always/ Not really)
If yes, you and your child are on the right track. No? then something is wrong. Are you too strict? Talk to your child, bring your child to share his/her feelings and thoughts without being judgmental or critical. Children should not be 'afraid' of parents. 


Do you teach your child family values, traditions and rituals? (Yes/ No)
Children are good at imitating. It is the parents' behavior which children are exposed to everyday, that mostly influence their growing years  till they turn into adults. Children are silent observers. Make sure you set a good example through the behavior you exhibit or choices you make. Teach your children your family traditions and rituals;  to respect elders, to be courteous, to follow etiquette and manners, patience and accept the differences in others. 

Do you nurture your child's talents and gifts?(Yes/ No/ I don't know if my child has any talents)
As a parent it's one the beautiful things you can do - to nurture your child's gifts and talents. You don't know or haven't truly cared to know if you are not aware of any hidden talent or gift in your child. So find out.


Do you and your spouse fight in front of children? (Yes / No)
That's a terrible thing to do actually. Children actually hate to see their parents fight. Settle your differences or issues without showing disrespect , restrain from yelling, screaming, and    don't use profane language. Discords should be settled privately, without dragging the children into it. Don't complain about your spouse to your children. Sometimes a child can grow up to resent a certain parent due to lack of true understanding. 

Is your child attending classes for dance, singing, musical instrument or art lessons? (Yes/No)
Involving your child in a hobby is very essential. It's anytime better than the child being stuck to video games or the T.V. or cell phone or unlimited internet surfing.

Do you only give importance to their education? (Yes, that's the most important thing/ I teach them values, get them involved in sport and other interesting activities besides education).

Education is important, but besides that, teaching values, involving them in creative hobbies,  sport, teaching them life skills and simple things like getting them to help around in the house will make them talented,  confident and self reliant individuals.  

Does it bother you if they get less grades? (Yes definitely /Not really, but I'd check if my child is having difficulty with a particular subject or teacher and the underlying reason and try to help in a positive way)
If the grades drop considerably, it's time to investigate what's going wrong, if it's not a huge drop, don't worry. If it's less than a competitor's grade, don't worry. If your child is disinterested in school work - it's time to talk to your child and teachers and find out what's happening. Some children may be good at math but not language, may be good in science but not math. So try to realize that it may not be possible for your child to be great in all subjects like your friend's child.  It's not the child's fault. Each child is built differently. So don't compare. Help the child in a nice way to understand and cope with a difficult subject.

Do you know who your children's friends are? (Yes /No/ Not really/ Just a few)
No? Find out! Get to know your child's friends by inviting them over. Get to know their parents....your child's friends can influence your child's behavior, attitude and even aspiration and personality in negative or positive way.  Encourage your child to keep good company.

Do you encourage your child to read stories or children's novels? (Yes / No)
There is nothing more beautiful than encouraging a child to read!


How does your child spend his or her leisure time (playing with friends/ always in front of the T.V./ Facebook/ surfing the net/ reading - novels, stories/ music/ art like drawing or painting/  craft/ video or computer games/ texting or talking on the cell phone/ don't know - my child shuts himself in his bedroom)
Please don't ignore if your child likes nothing better than sitting in front of the T.V. or computer or continuously talking on the phone or texting or playing video games all the time. It's absolutely unhealthy for a growing child. Get your child to do creative things instead.


Are you harsh with your child? Do you spank your child? Are you impatient with you child? (Yes/ No)
Being harsh, rude or overly critical, instilling fear or spanking can damage a child's spirits and constant ill treatment of the child can lead to personality disorders, aggressive and hostile and rash behavior when it grows up. Children find it difficult later on to love a difficult and tough parent. Forgive small mistakes and correct your child's wrong doing through constructive ways, by patiently explaining the need to follow rules, and by setting a good example yourself. 


Is your child is being bullied at school or in the neighbourhood? Do you sense a bully in your child; does he or she enjoy bullying and intimidating other children?
If your child is the victim, talk to the bullies or school authorities and bring it to an end. If your child is bullying others, or in company that bullies others,  don't tolerate it, put an end to it by making your child understand that he should respect other children and no one should be treated badly or cruelly and that's unacceptable and wrong. It's also true that parents who possess an arrogant or aggressive personality pass on their negative behavior onto the child who takes pleasure in bullying other children. Yes, it's a vicious cycle. 


When you observe your child, does he or she appear to you as a happy person / kind and  loving/ helpful/ understanding/ always complaining/ never satisfied/ gets his or her way by throwing tantrums/ bossy/ getting into trouble/ difficult to deal with.
From this question, the answers are obvious! If you sense there is a communication gap, or your child is unhappy or sad or troubled, or has an anger or behavioral issue,  don't brush it aside, don't ignore. That's not the solution. Do involve yourself gently and try to find out and help your child. It's not just adults who have problems, even children do too!

PARENTING - IMPORTANCE OF FAMILY TIME

When I talk to most of the young parents, I feel they are so busy with office work and house hold chores, and the children are busy with loads of homework, assignments, and preparing for tests. 'We have no time' is a common statement I hear parents say. Children seem to spend less time playing outside. In a world that's reigned by technology,  leisure means, surfing the net, checking facebook, playing video or computer games or texting and talking on the cell phone. Technology is good, but it's best when it's kept under check when it comes to young children. Children are not built to be sedentary and it's extremely unhealthy for them. They need to run about and play - they need a lot of physical activity. It's important to involve them in some sport or send them out to play with friends for an hour atleast. 

Every day, spend some family time together, find that time that everyone don't seem to have...talk to them, find out if they have any issues or problems at school, laugh with them, listen to their stories patiently. Don't compare them with other children. Bring out the best in them, by letting them believe in themselves and by letting them know how much you love them. It's important to take your children out every weekend and spend some fun time with them. Over the years, children will may not remember all the expensive clothes or gifts you bought them, but they sure will remember how they were treated and whether you were there for them whenever they needed you. 

PROTECTING CHILDREN FROM GOING MISSING AND OTHER DANGERS

A little boy of 8 years residing in Salmiah, who was out playing, went missing on Saturday evening from 6.30pm, causing much pain and anguish to his parents and shocked the community. There were search parties looking for the child the whole night and next morning. Fortunately 15 hours after the child went missing, he was found at a local police station next morning, and the child is back with his parents. ‘I am glad I got my son back alive’, said the mother. One of the saddest things, I have heard a mother say is what this little boy’s mother said, ‘When your child goes missing, you go through hell’.

Young children are curious by nature, it’s natural to want to explore the neighbourhood while playing or wander off sometimes with friends or even alone. This poses quite a danger as the child can

* Get lost and not find its way home and get scared

* A stranger with ill intent can take him away
* The could fall victim to child theft/molestation/kidnap
* He/she could get into an accident


A lot of children go missing each year, sometimes they are found, sometimes they aren’t. Parents of young children who play together, can take turns to go down each day, to keep a watchful eye to prevent the child from wandering off, or stranger approaching them , or running across on the road to get a ball. Little children can be very trusting towards older children and older people because they are innocent and unaware of the cruel and terrible things that happens in the world around them. As much as we would love to teach little children life skills, make them independent, do it with awareness, always keeping the safety of the child in mind. When a little child makes a mistake or does something, don't be harsh with your words, or scare the child with severe punishment, that a sense of fear arises in the child, which makes him want to run away from home. Parents could discuss and implement certain safety rules at home and make sure the child abides by it. Ensure you spend quality time with your child. Take your child out more often; spend time as a family. Engage him sports and hobbies along with other children. 

* Keep the main door locked and under no circumstance allow the child to open the door and go off to play without informing/asking the parent.

* When someone rings the door bell and you are busy, the child might run to open the door. It’s not always a known person who could be at the door. It’s best if parents or older children answer the door.

* Never let your child play alone outside without the presence of a trusted adult. 

* Make sure when you are out in the Mall or shopping centres, or amidst a crowd , your child is always with you. Your child could get attracted to a toy or something interesting it sees and walk away from you not realizing he could get lost.

* Not to talk to strangers at all and to inform you immediately if a stranger tried to approach him.

* Give clear and strict instructions not to take a lift from a stranger while while returning home from school and to stick to the arrangement you have made – like you picking up your child or the child returns home by school bus.

* If you are a working parent, ensure a friend, a neighbor or a nanny sees your child off while to the school bus in the morning and receive the child when it returns.

* If you are willing to have your child sleep over at a friend’s place, ensure that you know every one in that house your child will be staying and give them safety instructions for your child.

* Don’t send your little child to the nearby shop to get you something since you're busy. It can be dangerous. Do it yourself or call the shop and have your things delivered or accompany your child to the shop and you both could chose and buy together.

* Never send your child alone in the elevator.

* If your child wants to go to a neighbour's house or the neighbouring building or nearby open grounds to play, don’t send him alone thinking its close by. Accompany your child, ensure there is an adult present while children are playing and pick up your child when play time gets over.

* When you correct your child, explain to him why you are correcting him and that you love him and no matter how angry or sad he feels, he should not run away from home or leave the house.

* Explain to your child what is right kind of touching and wrong kind of touching and not to allow strangers to touch him and to let you know if he is uncomfortable around any adult known or unknown.


* Let your child memorize 2 or 3  important phone numbers/mobile number of parents, relatives/close family friends so he call during an emergency.


* The child should be told that in case he is lost and can't find his way home, to get into a near by shop and make a phone call to the parents, friends or relative.

CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM VERSUS DESTRUCTIVE CRITICISM

Those of you who have children would always be anxious to raise them well and teach them right from wrong and instill values. When your children do something wrong or conduct themselves in a manner that’s not acceptable, you would tend to correct them. But while correcting them, please bear in mind the importance of constructive criticism and avoid crushing or destructive criticism. Never yell, use harsh words, name calling or statements to put them down, rather select your words carefully, put some love into your voice, yet be firm to instill your message or values, so the child understands the difference between ‘acceptable behaviour’ and ‘unacceptable behaviour’ and still feel loved and wanted. A child is a little human being with all the feelings and emotions that we have. We wouldn’t like to be criticized harshly right?

THE WORLD REVOLVES AROUND ME

This cute little t-shirt for toddlers is available at NEXT

To a little child 'the world revolves around him' and to parents, their world revolves around their children or rather their children are their world!

PARENTING

Being a parent is one of the most wonderful gifts of nature. Parenting is certainly a joyous experience but it has it's ups and downs, challenges and there is no 'one size fits all' means of parenting. Cherish being a parent during the happy times and the difficult times. I came across this beautiful parenting wisdom (below) which I feel happy to share with you.

We are here to love our children, to nurture them, to walk with them, to let them go and be there at every turn of their journey in life. Sometimes, they need us more than others. Savour the journey. Never stop being Mom and Dad! We never leave their hearts and they never leave ours. - Traci Gaffney

PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA ON FATHERHOOD

U.S. President Barack Obama spoke on his Saturday radio and made an Internet address to fatherhood. He talked about growing up without a dad, his own failings as a father and the values he hopes to teach his daughters Malia, 12, and Sasha, 10. "In the end, that's what being a parent is all about - those precious moments with our children that fill us with pride and excitement for their future; the chances we have to set an example or offer a piece of advice; the opportunities to just be there and show them that we love them." said President Obama.  

Obama's father left when he was very young and he was raised by his grandparents in Hawaii. "I felt his absence and I wonder what my life would have been like had he been a greater presence." the president said. "That's why I've tried so hard to be a good dad for my own children. Above all, children need our unconditional love, whether they succeed or make mistakes; when life is easy and when life is tough. What children need most is their parents' time and a structure that instills self-discipline and responsibility".  President Barack Obama said through his Twitter account, that being a dad is sometimes his hardest job, but also the most rewarding. This year, President Obama's mentoring initiative is, Strong Fathers, Strong Families, which will highlight the important role fathers play in creating strong families.
 

Father's Day out : President Obama took his girls Malia and Sasha to Thomas Sweet in Georgetown,  on Father's Day and enjoyed cookie dough and vanilla ice cream Thomas Sweet, prides as "the favored ice cream shop of prominent Washingtonians for generations, preferred by senators and Presidential families." The sweetery offers ice cream with "Blend-Ins," soft frozen yogurt, chocolate, and fresh fudge. 

Father's Day - Icecream at Thomas Sweet. President Obama with daughter Sasha

Malia with an almost finished cookie dough and vanilla icecream on Father's Day; image credit www.obamafoodorama.com

Source : www.msnbc.msn.com (Click here to read whole article) 

Click on the following for  President Obama's Father's Day Presidential Proclamation